Imperfection is Perfection

'Did your child get enough Omega 3 today?'
That was a marketing statement I read in a magazine a few days ago. Can you believe that? Enough omega 3? Talk about pressure. If I was a perfect parent then yes, my child would have willingly eaten her serve of fresh fish, washed down with 250ml of milk (for calcium), followed by 4 segments of mandarin (for vitamin C), 8 spinach leaves (for folic acid and fibre), one piece of wholemeal toast spread with organic peanut butter (for fibre, carbohydrates and protein) etc etc etc, you get the picture. Not only that, but she would have participated in 4 hours physical activity, slept for 12 hours uninterrupted at night, napped for 2 hours during the day, engaged with me one on one for most of the day, had social play with other toddlers her age for 2 hours per day etc. And thats just Roma not to mention my own needs.

The message we get from society (which primarily stems from marketing agents and the media) is that all these things and more are essential to have a healthy, happy family; however they are conflicting messages. I cannot engage with Roma one-on-one and also prepare her fresh fish. I cannot force her to eat the healthy foods required to give her all the vitamins and minerals etc she 'needs.' I cannot get my half an hour of exercise, whilst also ensuring she gets her 2 hour nap. I can't do everything. I'ts impossible and its not because i am a single parent it is because i am human and the social expectations are too high. I, as a perfectionist succumb to these expectations all too often, I want to be the perfect parent, I want to have a healthy child, I want her to grow up happy and well adjusted but experts actually warn against this. Striving to be a perfect parent is actually seen as a negative, because your child doesn't learn that its ok to make mistakes, she gets unrealistically high expectations of herself too and ends up with the same anxieties I have. So in a nutshell, being imperfect is what we should strive for and accept. Being imperfect is, perfect.